Scorrybreaks

Rebekah contemplates beans. Photo: Gulf News

Somewhere in the universe, we are told,  there are an infinite number of monkeys with typewriters gradually creating the works of Shakespeare over the course of eternity.

We however feel eternity is a very long time* and the Cat-Herder for one is inclined to impatience with time paradox and large (or indeed small) numbers**.

So in the meantime we have an almost completely unrelated game in which we collect Sentences That May Never Have Been Heard before.

These are unlikely combinations of words that are hammered out by the Typewriter-Monkeys in our brain during the normal course of conversation  and then saved and cherished and brought out to amuse ourselves every time we are bored which is often.

We make no apology for compiling them here and we will add to them whenever we feel like.

 

"Jen and I are going to launch into a fine display of synchronised yurt-nagging." (Cat Herder)

"Tell the real ale duck to take the up-rope." (Ben)

"Helix, don't lick the Dalek." (Cat Herder)

"I'm sorry, I broke your cow." (Ben)

"There is a goat under the office. I blame the Masons." (Cat Herder) 

"Some sheep have an automatic step-away-from-the-cliff option." (Ben) 

"That's why whales are spotty, because they're so delicious." (Cat Herder)

"...pleasantly close to Macclesfield." (Cat Herder)

"You minumus of cask-strength Laphroaig made!" (Helix)

"I was licked by a bat at the office party." (Cat Herder) 

"I want someone tall to sniff this meter-box for me." (Cat Herder) 

 

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*Duh 

** And fractions. And small children. And words ending in "-ant". And in fact any problem that can't be solved by hitting it with a spanner.